THE 2024 Toyota AFL Premiership Season is in full swing, and Damian Barrett's Sliding Doors is back!
So put your seatbelt on and enjoy the ride as Damo takes off the gloves and takes aim at your team.
So what is he saying about your club? What's he saying about the AFL? You can't say that, Damo, can you? Check it out below.
>> Check out the latest from Damian Barrett
IF ...
the 2024 season has been a massive mess ...
THEN ...
Riley Thilthorpe finally getting to play his first game of the year after a knee injury will be one of the few positives. Crows should use the remaining seven games to "start" the 2025 season.
IF ..
the Eagles, after a coach sacking, may have added motivation for Sunday's match ...
THEN ...
it won't matter. The Lions are on a very nice roll and Lachie Neale has more Brownlow votes to accumulate.
IF ...
Butters, Merrett, Stewart and Miller are among Alex Cincotta's "victims" this year ...
THEN ...
really keen to see how he goes against The Bont on Saturday. The biggest task he will ever get.
IF ...
Elliott is a big inclusion for Friday night's match against Geelong ...
THEN ...
Mihocek being out for the remainder of the year is a huge loss. Pies precariously placed in their flag defence. Can't get a break on injuries. The aura has all but disappeared.
IF ...
Darcy Parish is yet to get a proper crack at the 2024 season ...
THEN ...
what depth. A gun midfielder who should be fit again inside three weeks. Bombers very nicely positioned to maintain a top-four place on the ladder.
IF ...
Jaeger O'Meara's form has been solid in the Dockers' impressive season ...
THEN ...
what an opportunity he's got on Saturday in Launceston to remind the Hawks of what they didn't want, when they forced him out under contract at the end of 2022.
IF ...
there's one club big Jez loves playing against ...
THEN ...
it's Collingwood. Has kicked 57 goals in 18 games against the Pies, 18 coming in the past four hitouts. And he's nearing top form, anyway. Could've booted 10 last week against the Hawks if he had his kicking boots on.
IF ...
Dimma reckons the Suns need to "grow the f*** up" ...
THEN ...
maybe he should've calmed the f*** down before creating the public pressure with his pledge to make finals. It's on him if they don't.
IF ...
it took a 33-point deficit against Carlton early in round 17 to belatedly force this club back into full-on attack mode ...
THEN ...
so be it. It finally happened. The Orange Tsunami. It's baaaaack.
IF ...
there's a guy in the comp who I think could be anything if he finally got an injury-free crack at footy ...
THEN ...
it's Mitch Lewis. Injury upon injury upon injury have meant he has played just 70 matches in seven seasons. And now out for another 12 months after suffering an ACL rupture last weekend.
IF ...
big Maxxy is out for a while with a broken leg ...
THEN ...
both the Demons' finals chances and Maxxy's chances of a seventh All-Australian gong may be Gawn.
IF ...
Nick Daicos' form in his first two seasons in the AFL was off the charts ...
THEN ...
Harry Sheezel's is surely entering the same charts.
IF ...
Mitch Georgiades has had a fantastic return from ACL damage, with 27 goals in 13 matches ...
THEN ...
he will be sorely missed this weekend against Gold Coast. His absence, via suspension for an off-ball hit last weekend against the Bulldogs, may be result-shaping against the Suns.
IF ...
someone in a leadership position at this club would finally wake up and realise there is a slow car crash unfolding ...
THEN ...
at least some proper plans for 2025 could be formulated. From the highest of highs to a self-created ugly mess. New coach Adem Yze is clearly struggling, and desperately needs help from people who are invested in the future.
IF ...
there were a handful of players the Saints could least afford to lose for Saturday's match against Adelaide ...
THEN ...
Bradley Hill and Marcus Windhager would be among them.
IF ...
Dean Cox loves the Swans and has long had a dream to take over from John Longmire as coach ...
THEN ...
the opportunity to engage with West Coast will still prove compelling. There isn't a succession plan at the Swans. Longmire, who may be coaching as well as at any stage of his 14 seasons in charge, is contracted to the end of 2025, and may seek another extension.
IF ...
the past three seasons have been disastrous ...
THEN ...
I am of the view that 2024 would not have been one bit better had Adam Simpson been exited last year. It was ugly, but Simpson absorbed the inevitable pain, and protected the next guy from some of the mess which will still come.
IF ...
there was zero energy in the entire Bulldogs team which lost to the Power in round 17 ...
THEN ...
with Cody Weightman back for round 18, against Carlton, there is guaranteed to be energy in the forward line, at least. This is a crucial game for coach Luke Beveridge.
AND THIS ONE'S FOR THE AFL
IF ...
Harley can't win the Rising Star and Isaac can't win the Brownlow ...
THEN ...
the awards functions later this season are going to be flat. What a shame that players other than the Brownlow Medal favourite have this season been able to play the week after belting opponents in the head.