STRAP yourselves in, footy fans - Damian Barrett's Sliding Doors is back in full swing for 2025. 

With the 2025 Toyota AFL Premiership Season underway, Damo's got plenty of thoughts about all 18 clubs - and the AFL - after another big off-season. 

So what is he saying about your team? What's he saying about the AFL? You can't say that, Damo, can you? Check it out below.

>> ALL THE LATEST NEWS AND OPINION FROM DAMIAN BARRETT

IF ...

Izak Rankine hasn't yet gone near an All-Australian jacket ...

THEN ...

he needs to make 2025 that year. Has as much talent as anyone in the game. No obvious match-up for him against North Melbourne at Adelaide Oval on Sunday. The best player at this club, time for him to prove it.

IF ..

it was a cyclone before a postponed Opening Round, high heat and high humidity before round one in Sydney and even higher heat and higher humidity when back in Brisbane for round two ...

THEN ...

this club sure can find itself in the middle of a weather event. And up to 70mm of rain forecast for Brisbane on Saturday, for the rescheduled Opening Round fixture.

IF ...

Michael Voss the coach could somehow channel Michael Voss the player into his team for Friday night's crunch match against the Bulldogs ...

THEN ...

the Blues would win easily. Reckon it's time for Vossy to go old-school, to simply demand within-rules brutality from his players.

IF ...

Darcy Moore in round two played on an opponent, Sam Darcy, who kicked four goals and could have kicked seven ...

THEN ...

weirdly, he played very, very well. Didn't do much wrong. After an ordinary 2024 season, he may be back to his All-Australian form.

IF ...

there is one player who just performs at or near his peak every single week ...

THEN ...

it is the captain of this club. Zach Merrett. Has already won best and fairests in 2016, 2019, 2021, 2023 and 2024. Was brilliant, yet again, on Thursday night, in a gutsy win against Port. There's a sixth Crichton Medal being struck already.

IF ...

the Dockers' loss to the Swans in the moment was borderline disastrous ...

THEN ...

upon reflection, it wasn't. Sydney will again by vying for the high reaches of the ladder. And another 1.5 seconds of game time would have seen Jye Amiss kick for goal for a win. But nothing will change unless the coach takes off the hand brake in his own head.

IF ...

Geelong was a racehorse ...

THEN ...

you couldn't back it on its last start, a loss to St Kilda. But it was checked early, with the Tom Stewart injury, and its closing sectionals were very good. Reckon it beats Brisbane on Saturday night.

IF ...

this club is serious about there being no ceiling on the 2025 season ...

THEN ...

it will waltz into the MCG on Saturday and dance away with a six-goal win. Can't believe I'm writing this, but I reckon it will do just that.

IF ...

the Bombers couldn't wait to get rid of Jakey because of "standards", whatever that means given he kicked 42 goals last year ...

THEN ...

the Giants said: "Thanks, we'll take him." Stringer in for his first game at his third club. Alongside another three-club player discarded by his two previous ones. Can't wait to see how the Stringer-Hogan-Toby combo works.

IF ...

Connor Macdonald is a big loss for the game against the Giants ...

THEN ...

Luke Breust is a big in. What a luxury. 

IF ...

Frankie Goes To Hollywood, Huey Lewis & The News, Jennifer Rush, Air Supply and even Celine Dion have all had cracks at the Power Of Love ...

THEN ...

Simon Goodwin is clearly all-in on the concept, too. Has been sprouting it the entirety of the off-season, in the 2025 season early rounds and once again this week in a Channel Seven interview. It may be a force from above, and a curious thing, but probably time for Goody to move into a tough-love verse, as his love song was always going to be judged on one thing – wins. There hasn’t been one in 2025.

IF ...

very few players are able explode into the big-time instantly, like Harry Sheezel ...

THEN ...

most are forced to embrace the slow-burn method. Tom Powell is one of those. The first-round pick from 2020 now heating up very, very nicely.

IF ...

Connor Rozee can rack up 23 kicks against lowly Richmond in round two ...

THEN ...

he needs to produce more than eight in a hard-fought game against Essendon on Thursday night in round three. Needs to stand up in these matches, as his counterpart Zach Merrett did.

IF ...

Noah Balta was suspended by the Tigers for four matches for his involvement in an off-season assault ...

THEN ...

I can’t see him playing for a whole lot longer than that. The courts will deal with it legally, but the football system will need to make its own adjudication, and statement, after the courts have their say.

IF ...

a Nasiah and a Rowan were the headline-grabbers in what happened last week in an unexpected win against the Cats in round two ...

THEN ...

don't forget the Jacks, Steele and Sinclair. Crucial to the outcome, most crucial to the season's outcomes.

IF ...

Riley Bice's last five minutes and The Chad's entire final quarter were instrumental in a brilliant Swans' win in round two against Freo ...

THEN ...

Joel Amartey's moment-seizing act was the actual match-winning move. Loved the way he outbodied his opponent. Loved even more how he took a breath and slotted the goal. Hope that propels him into the next tier of impact.

IF ...

Harley gave the middle finger to some taunting Brisbane Lions supporters at the Gabba last Sunday ...

THEN ...

who cares? Not me. Surely we're all able, in 2025, and with the playful intent obviously behind it, to move on, without the need for official headquarters sanction. Hope he figuratively raises the middle one on Sunday, via a best on ground performance in the derby.

IF ...

Bevo, out of nowhere, is heading down a path he has long loathed, Media Street, to make sure there are coaching options for him outside of the Bulldogs when his contract expires in October ...

THEN ...

he's still to properly explain how under his watch gun players Josh Dunkley and Bailey Smith could no longer play under him. And Jamarra Ugle-Hagan is now in the throes of seeking the same move.

AND THIS ONE'S FOR THE AFL

IF ...

you land a full-on punch on an opponent's eye-socket region and are free to play the next week because the damage, while very nasty, thankfully and fortunately didn't cause concussion ...

THEN ...

let's once and for all publicly clear things up with Match Review Office findings. Just admit it is all outcome-based. At least that way we could partially get our heads around some of the decisions made each week. For what it's worth, I'm glad Rory Lobb escaped sanction for his hit on Mason Cox. If Cox was KO’d, Lobb would’ve probably got three weeks. I still cannot believe Justin McInerney copped three weeks for his almost innocuous collision with Brandon Starcevich, who in that relayed contact suffered his third concussion in 12 matches.