IF | THEN | |
Adelaide | you had to go to war ... | ... you'd like big Texan standing alongside. You just know he’d have your back. |
Brisbane Lions | James Aish's odds of being a Lion in 2016 were 100-1 back in June ... | ... it's toss-of-the-coin odds now. Pies still open to a future with him, though. |
Carlton | the Blues aren't realistic ... | ... they'll botch the Yarran trade. Need to realise that, as blisteringly good as the 24-year-old is, there won't be a draft pick much better than No.25 on offer. |
Collingwood | there's one situation this week which has left us perplexed ... | ... it is the decision by a yet-to-play-a-senior-game, former No.10 draft pick to exit to a lowly club. |
Essendon | John Worsfold stage-manages his way through one more paid Channel Seven interview ... | ... in the 1996 words of Terry Wallace, we'll "spew up". And, never seen more hypocrisy than in his decision to take the meeting with Paul Little when only months earlier as AFLCA president he was seeking to outlaw such sneaky practice. |
Fremantle | there's been a VFL/AFL premier with greater reliance on two blokes who stand 173cm and 177cm tall ... | ... we're not aware of it. No pressure, though, Ballas, Walters. |
Geelong | we thought that the 1996 (McKernan) and 1997 (Grant) Brownlow Medal presentations were awkward ... | ... a Danger win on Monday night will take awkward to a whole new level. |
Gold Coast | we're Rodney Eade ... | ... we're reconsidering booting Bennell out. Just have the feeling he is going to win a Brownlow at his next club. |
Greater Western Sydney | you're prepared to take a swing at a man the size of Jon Patton ... | ... you've got no fear at the moment you take the swing. |
Hawthorn | Gibson was super unlucky not to gain All Australian selection in 2013 and 2014 ... | ... he's super lucky to get a spot in 2015. Really glad he's got the honour, because he thoroughly deserves the status of AA, but selectors need to stop robbing a player in one year in order to rectify a past mistake. |
Melbourne | there's a team we feel is keeping its cards close to its chest as trade period looms ... | ... it is this one. Predicting a massive play from left-field. |
North Melbourne | you win four finals in two years ... | ... no matter what happens on Saturday night you are a success. Regularly doubted this mob in 2015 but please, we need more teams prepared to go all-out for wins instead of the ones who hide behind three, four and five-year plans. Hello, Collingwood. |
Port Adelaide | there's one arrangement we don't see working next year ... | ... it is a forward line of Dixon and Schulz. |
Richmond | the Tigers truly believe Collingwood's Treloar chase is fish-rot-stench rotten ... | ... please bring us all in on the theory. |
St Kilda | the Saints aren't ready to go bang on the day the trade period officially opens ... | ... they'll run the risk of losing Carlisle. Other clubs are still considering going hard. |
Sydney Swans | Goodes hadn't endured the racist booing this year ... | ... we reckon he would've gone around again in 2016. Was second only to the brilliant Kennedy when it came to the Swans' best in the finals. We'll forever be disgusted at the hurt inflicted by some in the final matches of an extraordinary career and life. |
West Coast | Nic Nat was super lucky to be given All Australian status in 2012 ... | ... he was super unlucky to miss out this year. Just plain wrong that he wasn't in the best 22 of 2015. |
Western Bulldogs | you're referring one of your players to the AFL integrity department over a conversation he might've had with his brother ... | ... you're surely going to also, retrospectively, refer everyone who played a role in sending Clay Smith back on to an AFL venue back in May after he had been diagnosed as suffering a third ruptured ACL. Can't pick and choose when it comes to integrity. |
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Follow Damian Barrett on Twitter: @barrettdamian