JOBE Watson admits he's still hurting and will need to time to heal after making the tough choice to hand back his 2012 Brownlow medal.
The Essendon midfielder announced on Friday he would return the best and fairest medal after an appeal by the 34 past and present Bombers was dismissed by the Federal Supreme Court of Switzerland last month.
Watson was awarded the game's highest individual honour in the season the Bombers undertook their controversial supplements program, resulting in suspensions this year for the 34 players.
While it was business as usual for the 31-year-old on Monday morning as he arrived at the Bombers' Tullamarine base, Watson admitted he was yet to come terms with his decision.
"I guess it'll be something that eventually I'll move on from, but at the moment it hurts a bit," Watson told reporters.
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The 2012 medal could now retrospectively be given to join runners-up Trent Cotchin and Sam Mitchell, with the AFL Commission to meet on Tuesday to make a decision.
Watson said he did not have an opinion on whether Cotchin and Mitchell should be given the award.
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Cotchin said in March he would accept the medal if Watson was stripped of it, while ex-Hawk Mitchell, who was traded to West Coast last month, has declined to comment on the issue.
Former Essendon forward Angus Monfries, who is now with Port Adelaide and was one of the suspended players, said on Monday he was "shattered" for his former skipper.