SEEMS the Bulldogs will be entering their preliminary final against Geelong with a sense of entitlement, after assistant coach Leon Cameron claimed their September action was just desserts for a solid season.
But if the movies of Clint Eastwood teach us anything -- and they do, heaps of stuff -- it's that "deserve's got nothin' to do with it".
Other valuable football lessons to be gleaned from Clint's cinematic tours-de-force are:
* never, under any circumstances, pay any attention to a single word said by anyone in authority, especially the coach. Simply play by your own fast and loose rules and all will be well in the end. Why? Because you get results, godamnit!
* shoot at goal while smoking a thin cigar and wearing a filthy poncho.
* an orang-utan might seem like a foolish addition to your bench but the fans will love it even if the "purists" don't think it's football.
* beat up the purists.
2. Yes, no, sorry
FAR BE it for The Four Points to argue with the highly scientific management of players' injuries these days, but we just wonder about how St Kilda is handling Luke Ball and his troublesome hamstring.
“He’s ticking the boxes," coach Ross Lyon said. "If he keeps ticking the boxes the medical team will make the call, the player will make the call and ultimately the match committee will make the call."
Sounds like there'll be ticks, boxes and calls all round -- a recipe for an especially nervous and itchy run-out. And dashing between wickets while fighting to urge to have a good hard scratch doesn't sound like good rehab to us.
3. Like emus and kangaroos
AND WHILE we're on the topic of slip-ups by the Saints, The Four Points thinks Lenny 'Isaac' Hayes made one when discussing his lower back issues yesterday.
Said Isaac: "In the end I got through the fitness test and was able to play the whole game so it won’t be an issue going forward."
While we commend Lenny's refusal to take a backward step, we do fear the potent Hawthorn midfield will exploit his inability for lateral movement.
4. We'll drink a drink a drink
KIWIS don't have blood, they have "H2-Bro" which is some sort of magic healing potion.
At least that's according to he of the silver fern tattoo, limping Hawks defender Trent Croad.
But the revelation will not go down well with our brothers and sisters across the Tasman when an army of blood-sucking scientists descend on the shaky isles, intent on synthesising some sort of cure-all from this mysterious 'H2-Bro' substance.
After all, the last person to make such a grandiose claim was Lily the Pink, and her "medicinal compound" didn't save her when the pharmaceutical companies came a-calling.
WHAT’S COMING UP
What to look out for on afl.com.au this Wednesday
Huddo sticks a pin in it
Boring speeches? Hackneyed clichés? Anthony Hudson runs the ruler over the All-Australian awards.
Show me all the rules, girl
Will any of the clubs rule out Ball, Chapman, Cooney, Bateman or Croad today? Will any of them be ruled in? We'll be watching, just in case.
Rocket science
As in 'Rocket' Eade, as in Rodney, as in the Western Bulldogs, as in biography, as in life story, as in make you laugh, make you cry, make you confused.
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The views in this story are those of the author and not necessarily those of the clubs or the AFL.
