Elise and I have moved from Ascot Vale to Port Melbourne because it’s closer to Elise’s work. I like Port Melbourne, there’s plenty to do there and heaps of cafes and places to eat out.
It might be an idea for us to head to Michael Firrito’s joint soon because he is developing into quite the cook.
Spud has become all ‘homely’ since getting engaged to Bonnie and is spending unprecedented time in the kitchen. One of his best mates has been overseas for a while and finally returned home the other day. He came back to Australia with a new girlfriend who had never been in the country before. To celebrate the occasion and make her feel welcome, Spud took the extraordinary step to bake a large cake. It wasn’t just an ordinary cake; it was a white and dark chocolate marble cake with a special welcome message on top that read, ‘Welcome to our home, Love Bonnie and Michael.’ It also had heaps of floral decorations on top and sparklers. I also heard that he doesn’t venture into the kitchen without his ‘Kiss me, I’m the cook’ apron on.
But if you thought Spud getting around in an apron was bad, then you’ll cringe at this. Our dietician Jona Segal was seen out in a pair of black shiny pants. Upon closer inspection, it turns out they were like black leather…even further investigation has revealed they were ‘pleather’ otherwise known as cheap fake leather.
Speaking of wardrobe faux pas, our masseur Luke ‘Flushy Flushrubs’ Warnett was getting around the airport before we headed to Adelaide threatening to fine players and staff for having the incorrect uniform on. The penalty he said was $10, but when push came to shove, Flushy went to water. Brad Scott walked into the Virgin Lounge with the famous club hoodie on instead of the club jacket and Flushy gave him a wide berth. Not wanting to let Flushy off the hook, someone teed Brad up to approach Flushy and ask, ‘Did you want to speak to me about something mate?’ to which Flushy replied, ‘Nah mate, it’s cool.’ Rules for some and not others Flushy? He is now avoiding the coach.
Ben Cunnington has also been keeping a low profile of late after a rumour started going around on Friday that he was spotted at the Miley Cirus concert on Thursday night. It’s about as bad as Jamie Macmillan, Brayden Norris and Matty Scott going to the cinemas to see the Justin Bieber movie I reckon.
Benny Warren and I went to the movies the other day after getting free tickets to see Bridesmaids. When we got to the counter to collect our tickets, the girl serving us started laughing. Milky was really embarrassed and got his iPhone out and started showing the girl photos of his girlfriend in an attempt to prove we weren’t a couple. It probably looked a whole lot worse when Sam Wright and Jack Ziebell arrived just minutes later to join us.
Sam was having a conversation with Ziebs about the television series Smallville and said that everything in the show except for Kryptonite was fake. In other words, he thought that Kryptonite was an actual type of crystal. Determined to be proven right, Sam challenged Jack to look it up on Wikipedia. But Sam isn’t the only one, it turns out that our own Rob ‘Super-Bob’ Burton thought it was real also. The only thing ‘Super-Bob’ has in common with Superman is the word ‘super’ in his nickname and the fact that he will look like Clark Kent soon because he just found out that he needs glasses.
It wasn’t reading glasses he needed on Sunday morning in Adelaide, it was sunglasses. When he woke up he was heard to have said, ‘What’s with all the lights on outside coming through the curtains?’.Our media manager Heath who was rooming with him quickly advised him that it was the sun. In Super-Bob’s defense, he did cop a nasty knock to the head while playing local footy and may still be struggling.
It’s the same with Lachie Hansen who may still be suffering the effects of concussion. He arrived home the other day to quickly pick something up from inside and was planning to head straight back out, so he left his car running. By the time he got inside and fluffed around a bit, he changed his mind and decided against going back out.
When he came out the next morning to head to training, he was a little confused and perplexed to find that his car was already running. He had left it on all night! We always knew he had a big engine.
Matty Scott (Motchy) has also had car trouble - he was with Ryan Bastinac trying to back his car out of the driveway but couldn’t get it moving. He got out and threw his hands up in the air and yelled to Basty “It won’t move, I think it’s stuffed!” Initially upset and thinking he was in for an expensive bill at the mechanic, luckily Basty came to the rescue and advised Motchy to release the handbrake.
Someone ought to put the brakes on Darren Crocker who is getting a bit ahead of himself after being the first person hit-up for an autograph at the airport when we arrived in Adelaide. A kid had a 1997 AFL magazine and it had a photo of him in it. Watto was giving it to him afterwards though, saying he was walking with a swagger and wobbling his head.
Hours later a few North people were walking down Rundle Mall after checking into the hotel with club cult figure Adam Marranello and he apparently said, ‘They say there are more pretty girls in Adelaide per capita than anywhere in the world.’ When asked who ‘they’ were, he couldn’t say. Basically meaning he had just made it up.
Ah, we have so many characters at this club players and staff included. Every week there are new, unbelievable stories and it’s my absolute pleasure to leak them to you!
