WITH the 2022 Toyota AFL Premiership season heading towards an epic finish on Saturday, Damian Barrett's Sliding Doors is really cranking up.

So put your seatbelt on and enjoy the ride as Damo takes off the gloves and takes aim at your team.

So what is he saying about your club? What's he saying about the AFL? You can't say that, Damo, can you? Check it out below.

>> CLICK HERE TO READ MORE BARRETT 

IF ...

the 2022 season was Texan's 14th, and he missed four rounds ...

THEN ...

polling a career-high 14 votes in the Brownlow was one of few Crows highlights for the year.

IF ..

the allegations are as serious as any levelled in the game's history against a football person of authority ...

THEN ...

if proven guilty, Chris Fagan will never coach again. But he now deserves due process and natural justice to play out.

IF ...

the Blues have a Brownlow medallist, TWO Coleman medallists and three 2022 All-Australian players on their books ...

THEN ...

the mystery of them losing their last four matches and missing the 2022 finals gets even deeper.

IF ...

Collingwood supporters have never got over the Wayne Harmes out-of-bounds tap in the 1979 Grand Final ...

THEN ...

add last weekend's Tom Papley push in the back of Darcy Moore to their unique finals torment. And prelim finals haven't been kind. While winning one in 2011 by three points, the Pies have lost prelims in 2007 (Geelong, five points), 2019 (GWS, four) and now 2022 (Sydney, one) by less than a kick.

IF ...

Don Pyke has said no to the coach process 

THEN ...

it would be advisable to ask him again, after he has completed tasks as senior assistant coach at the Swans in Saturday’s Grand Final.

IF ...

Peter Bell is being sounded out for the North Melbourne CEO post ...

THEN ...

he's still got a big job to perform for the Dockers in the trade period, with a lot of requested exits. Bell said last week he would be rejecting the contracted Rory Lobb's trade request. That would be a feather in his cap if he held firm.

IF ...

three first-round draft picks seemed significantly overs to some at the end of 2020 when they were used as part of the deal to land Jeremy Cameron ...

THEN ...

by Saturday evening it could look like the equivalent of loose change. Cameron was recruited to win a flag. He's done everything perfectly to this point of that pursuit in 2022.

THE DEPTH TEST How Cats, Swans' less-storied names stack up

IF ...

the Dockers became the big beneficiaries of the Suns' salary cap dump in the form of Will Brodie in last year's Trade Period 

THEN ...

it is understandable why Hawthorn, Essendon, Geelong and St Kilda are fighting hard for this year's salary cap dump player, Jack Bowes. Pick seven comes with his two-season salary.

IF ...

Phil Davis was effectively the first player to be signed to the Giants 

THEN ...

it's great to see him get the all-clear to go around in 2023. Was "owed" money by the club after a re-jigged contract, so he had the negotiating whip hand. Hopefully his hamstrings will allow him the eight games he needs to reach a very deserved 200-game milestone.

IF ...

Jeff has this year fought so desperately to stay on as president of Hawthorn ...

THEN ...

I don't care where in the world he may have been this week (having been a guest on Lindsay Fox's 85th birthday cruise from New York to Montreal), he needed to either front a camera or at least put his name to the response to the harrowing allegations made by Indigenous players who were once at his club.

IF ...

Oliver, Petracca and Gawn combined for 70 votes in the 2021 Brownlow and thus robbed each other of the chance of actually winning it 

THEN ...

it happened again this year. It was a combined 61 in 2022, with a far lower winning tally (Cripps 29 this year, Wines 36 last year).

IF ...

the allegations are as serious as any levelled in the game's history against a football person of authority ...

THEN ...

if proven guilty, Alastair Clarkson will never coach again. But he now deserves due process and natural justice to play out. 

IF ...

Connor Rozee is able to complete a massive off-season 

THEN ...

there's no reason he won't be in Brownlow Medal calculations next year. Finished the 2022 season beautifully, with 12 of his 14 Brownlow votes coming after round 14. Poised to take the game over.

IF ...

this season ended prematurely with an elimination final loss to Brisbane

THEN ...

there was no mucking around in seeking positive additions for 2023. Sacked Essendon coach Ben Rutten back as a senior assistant to Damien Hardwick. Big, big tick. 

IF ...

on Saturday, Joel Selwood secures another premiership ...

THEN ...

that will be his personal win No.22 in finals. The St Kilda Football Club has won 22 finals in its 125-year VFL/AFL life.

IF ...

I've ever seen a player built for the MCG on the last Saturday in September ...

THEN ...

it is Chad Warner. Will win a Brownlow one day, as soon as next year, and I'm tipping him for this year's Norm Smith Medal, in a narrowly losing side.

FROM GEELONG, WITH LOVE The McCartins' unique link to Cats territory

IF ...

this club's slide was embarrassingly dramatic in 2022 

THEN ...

apart from Oscar Allen regaining fitness there isn't an obvious second reason to suggest 2023 will be much better. This club would once have not stood for the rubbish of this year.

IF ...

Bevo has had full run of the Dogs for eight seasons he has had in charge, and some might say deservedly so given there have been two Grand Finals appearances in that period 

THEN ...

there needs to be a significant shift in how power is distributed in this club's football department going into 2023. This year ended with a lot of questions marks over player attitude and behaviour.

AND THIS ONE'S FOR THE AFL

IF ...

the AFL's football operations boss Brad Scott, after the Grand Final, was to indicate to Essendon a keenness to explore its vacant coaching job ...

THEN ...

it would be as good as his.