ALASTAIR Clarkson admits standing aside as North Melbourne coach was difficult and "a little embarrassing" but the extended break has helped regain his mental and physical health.
Ahead of his return to the coaching box this Sunday, Clarkson has addressed in-depth the decision that shocked the football world.
On May 18, the 55-year-old announced he was indefinitely taking a break from the Kangaroos due to the mental strain of the Hawthorn racism saga.
The AFL has since announced no adverse findings against Clarkson, Chris Fagan or Jason Burt over the historical racism allegations at the Hawks.
Clarkson, Fagan and Burt all vehemently denied any wrongdoing.
The four-time Hawthorn premiership coach has taken back the Kangaroos coaching reins from interim mentor Brett Ratten ahead of this week's clash with Melbourne.
"The time away from the club has been difficult but imperative," Clarkson wrote in a letter to members on Tuesday.
"Stepping aside was challenging, isolating, confronting and even a little embarrassing.
"I've now come to realise that nothing is embarrassing when it comes to addressing your physical and mental wellbeing."
Clarkson has expressed gratitude for all the support he received from the club and other key people during his time away from Arden St.
"Ten weeks ago I came to the realisation I needed to be genuine to myself, my family and my football club and acknowledge those priorities were not being met," he wrote.
"As a result, I needed to remove myself from the football treadmill.
"(Wife) Caryn and I were getting warning signals regarding my physical and mental wellbeing on numerous occasions, and May 17 was the day of realisation that I could only invest in my family, my club and my community if I got myself back to full health.
"With the help of Dr David Cahill, Dr Peter Parker and Professor Steve Davis, we have put in place strategies that have been pivotal to my progress, and these are ongoing needs I endeavour to address moving forward.
"Ironically, returning to coaching our club is a very important part of that process.
"The North Melbourne Football Club has confronted many hurdles in its existence. Our members and supporters have consistently maintained faith in tough times and found a way to rise above these challenges.
"That care has been extended to me again in these past three months and I am forever grateful for the unwavering support I have received from North Melbourne, my family and friends."
Clarkson will front a press conference at Arden St on Friday ahead of North's game against the Demons.
The game against Melbourne will coincide with Clarkson's 400th game as AFL coach - the first person to achieve that feat since Leigh Matthews in 2006.
