OF ALL the conversations Wil Powell had to have after he was banned for using a homophobic slur earlier this season, the ones with his two brothers were the hardest.
As members of the gay community, Powell's brothers were hurt as much as anyone by comments the young Gold Coast Sun says were "stupid and illogical" and which he instantly regretted.
Powell crossed the line in Gold Coast's round eight match against Brisbane, and after immediately self-reporting to Suns football boss Wayne Campbell, was slapped with a five-game ban by the League.
It came just a month after Port Adelaide's Jeremy Finlayson had been suspended for three matches for a similar indiscretion, while this week young St Kilda player Lance Collard copped a six-week ban for a similar offence.
Speaking for the first time since returning from his ban, Powell told AFL.com.au it was a mistake he will have to live with for the rest of his life.
It was a mistake that hurt those closest to him, but also one he feels puts him in a good position to educate others.
"As soon as I said it, I knew it was stupid and illogical and no-one should ever say something like that to another person," Powell told AFL.com.au.
"I deeply regretted it and now for the rest of my career it's hanging over my head and I have to live with what I've done. I feel stupid for doing it."
Powell immediately apologised to the Lions player he made the remark to and then again following the match.
He said while owning up to his mistake was not difficult, what followed with his family was much harder.
"I've had some hard conversation with family members. I've got two gay brothers. I was very apologetic to them.
"I've had to explain the stupidity of what I said ... I've gone through the education.
"I think I learnt the most off my brothers because they're family members I've hurt and to hear them speak ... it really narrowed down that what I'd done was very severe.
"I personally hurt the people I love. And hurt a whole wide community. It hurts.
"It's on my shoulders now to call it out, whether it be on the field or even if I hear it as a back comment in the changerooms, even out in public. It's just to stand up for that sort of thing now."
Powell will play his 100th game against Greater Western Sydney at Engie Stadium on Saturday, with his entire family making the trip from Perth to watch him run through the banner with five-month-old son Theo.
"The other boys that have hit milestone games have had videos and their families talk about them," he said. "It's just seeing the people around you that you love so proud of you for what you do.
"I'm living young fellas' dreams out, and to play a brand of footy that kids can look up to and know that my family are proud of and my teammates are proud of is a really special feeling.
"It'll be quite the tribe (at the game) and I've just heard they're doing the guard of honour. It'll be pretty special holding little Theo through the banner and seeing all the people I love."
