AHEAD of his return from a five-game suspension, Steven May has pleaded with the footy community to not judge him purely on the bump that knocked out Brisbane Lion Stefan Martin.
A remorseful May said he would take the bump out of his game following the controversial hit that flattened the Lions ruckman and left him concussed.
The Gold Coast full-back said it had been difficult watching his teammates lose every match since his suspension, and was hell-bent on winning back their trust.
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May said only his actions could redeem what he described as a "wrong decision".
"I didn't want the wider football world to judge me purely on that, and that's all they have to go off because they don't know me personally," May said.
"I was embarrassed about that because people are going to call me what they like and they can only judge me off my actions.
"My job now is to build respect back by the way I play football and the way I conduct myself in the community.
"The world's not over, I've got a chance, I'm not finished, and I look forward to building that respect back."
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May said he had let himself, the fans, the club, his teammates and his family down.
He said, in hindsight, he should have just "went for the footy".
"Speaking to a few coaches, they say you can't get suspended for running 100 miles an hour at the footy. That's where I stuffed up," he said.
"You can't really get much out of a bump anymore.
"I'll probably take that out of my game. Obviously not shepherding, I do that, but I won't try and run through blokes as such."
Aside from working on his fitness, May has spent much of the past five weeks working with an inexperienced defence that has also been missing fellow tall Rory Thompson, along with regulars Trent McKenzie and Adam Saad.
He said despite losing its past six matches, Gold Coast could still make an impact this season, starting with Sunday's game at Domain Stadium against West Coast.
"A big problem with us at the moment is our (lack of) confidence and turnovers, they're really hurting us," May said.
"We're going to get a few troops back … and there'll be a lot more pressure on selection and that's when performances go up.
"I know it's disappointing, but we're not even halfway through the year and we'll judge ourselves on the way we finish the year rather than this patch."
