ADELAIDE
Brenton Sanderson
To keep pumping those weights. The bod's holding up pretty well for a bloke about to turn 40, isn't it? How 'bout those pecs!
BRISBANE LIONS
Justin Leppitsch
To invite all the new draftees to dinner at my home once a week, to ask after their families/girlfriends/pets/tattoos every time I pass them in the corridor, and to ask if they are enjoying all that delightful Brisbane and the wonderful Sunshine State has to offer.
CARLTON
Mick Malthouse
To be nice to the media, my players, furry animals, charity muggers, telephone canvassers, old ladies crossing the street, altitude camp deniers, Mormon missionaries knocking on my door, etc. Actually, cancel point one … let's just stop the pressers.
COLLINGWOOD
Nathan Buckley
To try to keep the peace by resisting the humming of 'La Bamba' when chatting with Heritier Lumumba.
ESSENDON
Mark Thompson
To remember that I have to endure only a year of being hounded by the media, booed by opposition supporters and having the sword of ASADA Damocles hanging over my head. And to get a babble translator if I end up on Footy 360 with Robbo again.
FREMANTLE
Ross Lyon
Do I want to have a New Year's resolution? Of course I do. Do I want to tell you what it is? Of course I don't.
GEELONG
Chris Scott
To try not to get angry when someone calls me 'Brad' at a media conference.
GOLD COAST
Guy McKenna
To consider whether bringing in Campbell Brown as boxing coach would be a good idea. David Warner is another possibility, but he's probably rooted to cricket.
GREATER WESTERN SYDNEY
Leon Cameron
To do better when following on as coach after the unique Kevin Sheedy than poor old Matthew Knights did at Essendon.
HAWTHORN
Alastair Clarkson
To check before the season starts whether they have reinforced the walls of the MCG coach's box and the roof of the dugout.
MELBOURNE
Paul Roos
To try to remember that I am not at the Swans any more and to stop reminding people that I recruited Joey Kennedy, Marty Mattner, Rhyce Shaw, Mike Pyke (he's from Canada), etc, etc, etc.
NORTH MELBOURNE
Brad Scott
To try not to get angry when someone calls me 'Chris' at a media conference.
PORT ADELAIDE
Ken Hinkley
To not wake up and discover that 2013 was really all just a lovely dream.
RICHMOND
Damien Hardwick
To check out whether getting a neck tattoo with some Maori phrases might help ensure that Dusty doesn't try to explore his options at other clubs next time his contract is set to expire.
ST KILDA
Alan Richardson
To be super-happy, super-excited, super-committed, and super-califragilisticexpialidocious at all times. But definitely not to be superseded like my unfortunate predecessor.
SYDNEY SWANS
John Longmire
To try to resist spending the next nine years covertly visiting every hip Sydney nightspot, every weekend.
WEST COAST
Adam Simpson
To stay calm when the Perth media describes me as 'a Victorian coach' after our first loss for the season, and to be as effusive, warm and revelatory as John Worsfold was at press conferences.
WESTERN BULLDOGS
Brendan McCartney
To get the grizzled beard happening again. The wise old owl look works well for a 'teaching' coach.