THE Olympics have done some funny things to some people and it seems even the sharpest footy minds are not immune.
Anthony Hudson has waxed lyrical and informed readers of afl.com.au yesterday that sports like synchronised fencing are as the stars to the AFL's sandpit . . . or something.
It's all a metaphor for reality which is comforting because The Four Points was worried Huddo was losing the vice-like on his . . . reality, that is.
Anthony goes on to talk about some important off-field appointments such as Richmond's CEO of football, and The Four Points would like to nominate the coach of swimmer Michael Phelps, Bob Bowman, for the role.
Anyone who can mix a swimming pool with the diet of Elvis and come up with the greatest Olympian of all time can work wonders with any list, we reckon.
2. A bit punchy
TONGUES are wagging and the trade whispers they're forming include three words: 'Daniel', 'Kerr' and 'Carlton'.
It's all a bit rich, according to Blues coach Brett Ratten who stressed yesterday that Kerr was still under contract at the Eagles.
"Daniel's in contract but everyone seems to be pointing the bone at us with him," he said.
Pointing the bone at us with him? No wonder the poor bugger is injured. And exhausted too, if The Four Points is any judge of these matters.
Ratten made no bones, however, about his desire to finish the season off strongly despite captain Chris Judd copping more knocks than in "the boxing ring at the Olympics"
Of course, the similarities to the noble art don't end there because just like a pugilist of the Australian Olympic variety, Judd won't get a sniff of anything approaching a final.
3. You take three nails and a couple of pieces of wood . . .
THIS week's hyperbole award goes to Dane Swan, good mate of Alan Didak.
For those who haven't heard of him -- which is probably most of you -- Didak is a Collingwood player with a bit of the scallywag about him. This trait, Swan reckons, has led Al to be "crucified" by the media.
Despite the grisly pronouncement, Swan hopes Al plays again for the Pies next year. Now, The Four Points can only remember one bloke who has come back from the dead post-crucifixion. That fella's name? Matthew Lloyd. Isn't that right, Mike Sheahan?
4. Put the lime in the coconut
AND IT'S a big warm fuzzy hi-ho silver and hail fellow and welcome back to one of The Four Points' favourites, Dr Hans-Wilhelm Muller-Wohlfarth.
It seems another crack AFL player is off to the land of pretzel to seek 'radical' treatment from the good doctor.
This time it's Carlton's big Irishman, and equally exotically named, Setanta O’hAilpin who will have calves blood injected in his – wait for it – calf! Hopefully his leg will be moooving more freely afterwards.
This is not the first time the Germans and Irish have worked in cahoots as the historically accurate The Eagle Has Landed depicts.
Gordon Brown look-a-likes, you have been warned.
What to look out for on afl.com.au this Thursday
The stats that stopped a nation
Jaw, get ready to drop. Justin Rodski, Matt Hardy and Stats City are in town.
Doin' Geelong
Kangaroos coach Dean Laidley on what will take to send the Cats feral.
Selection, no High Court appeals
Afl.com.au is first with all the ins and outs for the weekend's matches.
The views in this story are those of the author and not necessarily those of the clubs or the AFL.
