Digging up a story
TUNNELLING is what chaps do when chaps are stuck in POW camps in World War II. We’ve heard of that. Seen the movie. Tunnelling is what other chaps do to try to find useful things such as gold, silver and bits of mud with valuable stuff stuck in it. We went on a school excursion and saw that.
We’ve heard of carpal tunnel, tunnel vision, and the Tunnel nightclub. But we’ve never heard of “tunneling”, as in trying to flip a flying player off balance as he’s attempting a mark. Like the Tunnel nightclub at 4am during the season, we suspect it’s not advisable for AFL players.
Cop that
WE’RE not convinced that this business of challenging suspensions doled out by the Match Review Committee is really worthwhile, after Fremantle’s Dean Solomon and Richmond’s Cam Howat both copped an extra week when the AFL Tribunal found them guilty on Tuesday night.
Solomon will now miss three weeks, which will include the time-honoured Western Derby – remember, that’s pronounced Durr-bee, rhyming with Herbie and Furby, not Dar-bee, rhyming with Derby.
Four-year plan
MELBOURNE’S James McDonald reckons the Demons are taking a bit of time to adjust to new coach Dean Bailey’s game plan, which may explain why they lost by 104 points to Hawthorn on the weekend. Bailey’s plan, so far as we can tell, involves getting the ball and kicking or handpassing it, as opposed to previous coach Neale Daniher’s plan of getting the ball and kicking or handpassing it.
Somewhat worryingly for Melbourne supporters, McDonald notes, "We've been working on this since October last year.” That’s six and a bit months, according to our calendar, but a mere bagatelle for McDonald, who also says, “You look at Hawthorn four years ago when Alastair Clarkson came in and they went through some pretty tough times when they first started". We fear it’s going to be a long, long road, Dees fans.
Bad dream
Here at The Four Points we know our footy, which is why we’re coming 128,956th in the Aurion V6 AFL Dream Team competition. It’s a cruel game. We had Scott Lucas in our team. Gawn. And Sean Rusling. Probably gawn. And Beau McDonald, who is retired. Really gawn.
Don’t let our misfortunes put you off. Grab yourself a Dream Team or three and stick it up your friends, family work colleagues and tunnellers when the chance to play in your own league begins in round four. And Dr Dream Team will be back soon. He’s been studying hard all summer to get his qualifications up to speed, writing away to one of those universities that sound like real universities – Oxfort, Canbridge or Harvaard – to get his doctorate. He may even understand Dean Bailey’s game plan.
What to look for this Wednesday on afl.com.au
Burgo’s Team of the Week
Our lovable larrikin and talented pianist Matt Burgan will produce his first team of the week for 2008, which will create lots of “water cooler” discussion. Or, if your place of work doesn’t have a water cooler, perhaps “water closet” discussion.
Coaches on show
Way out west, John Worsfold and Mark Harvey will meet the media and talk positively about stuff.
Big grabs and top snags
And stand clear, because the 2008 Toyota AFL Mark of the Year and the 2008 Toyota AFL Goal of the Year awards are heading your way. Someone could be standing on your shoulders before the day is out – unless you can “tunnel” them, of course.
