1.Departure lounge
A WORD of advice, if you're on the payroll at a club out of, or on the cusp of, finals contention – don't get too attached to your reserved parking space.
Melbourne kicked things off last week, sending CEO Paul McNamee on his way with nothing more than a thanks for his three months service and, we trust, a souvenir Nathan Carroll headband.
Richmond followed suit on Sunday, confirming football manager Greg Miller's departure after six years. Yesterday the Tigers explained they wanted to get the jump on other clubs by ditching Miller as soon as humanly possible.
By the same theory the Tigers will surely be showing half their playing list the door by Thursday, as the NAB AFL Draft is only 123 days away.
President Gary March said the Tigers were after a more “contemporary” person for the role. Someone new, someone fresh, someone with their ear to the heartbeat of modern society. Sadly, however, Mr T is no longer in town.
2. Locomotion
THE turnstiles are spinning like contemporary pop artist Kylie Minogue over at West Coast, where the club took carelessness to new levels yesterday by losing not one but two coaches.
Fitness coach Stuart Cormack left for Essendon, followed quickly by assistant coach Darren Harris, who is heading for ovals new, perhaps also in Victoria.
On the same day the Eagles signed Matt Rosa and The Quinten to new deals, and assistant coach Peter Sumich – who presumably isn't getting too comfortable in his blue and yellow desk chair – suggested Brent Staker might have earned himself another contract with his standout performance against St Kilda.
We're going to go out on a limb here and suggest West Coast's HR rep only comes in for one afternoon per week.
3. Purple heart
IF THE Eagles can somehow retain enough personnel for Sunday's western derby, they're likely to enjoy another charged encounter, after the news that the game will be Shaun McManus's last.
McManus has played 227 games but more importantly for his legacy, has a heart shaped exactly like an anchor. It pumps purple, green and red blood through his body, making a little 'heave' sound as it flows out through the arteries, and an imperceptible 'ho' as it sucks back through the veins.
McManus will retire as the last remaining member of the list with which Fremantle joined the league in 1995. It follows that the atmosphere at the derby will be every bit as emotional as when Harold left Neighbours.
4. Farewell, Wilburrrr
A FEW thousand kilometres east, Michael Wilson is Port Adelaide's Shaun McManus, in that his blood flows black and teal, he spells 'revolution' with a funny backwards 'R' and he never stop stop stops till he drop drop drops.
Sadly for Port fans, Wilson appears likely to join McManus as an ex-footballer after this season, with coach Mark Williams suggesting yesterday that a persistent knee injury could end Wilbur's playing days
There's happier news for skipper Warren Tredrea, who despite missing the rest of the season with his shoulder injury will play on next year, and Peter Burgoyne, while talks are underway with ruckman Dean Brogan.
The Power will begin the hunt for used players, preferably owned by only one club, who used them once a week or so to go shopping and didn’t get up to any funny business like burnouts. If Port is interested, we believe there is also at least one CEO, a football manager, an assistant coach, and a very close friend of Peter Bell on the market.
WHAT'S COMING UP
What to look out for this Tuesday on afl.com.au
Team of the Week
Matt Burgan puts 352 players through his series of giant sieves, sifting and sifting until only the finest, most precious 22 remain. Then lists them for your convenience in order of playing position
NAB AFL Rising Star
Jennifer Witham corners this week's nominee for an exclusive interview. We'll also have highlights of the performance that won him the nomination.
Terry
As Harold and Charlene are to Ramsay Street, so Tuesdays are to Terry. Richmond's coach explains his cunning new plan to clone 21 Joel Bowdens, and more.
North Melbourne, Geelong, Sydney Swans, Collingwood and Melbourne
Five more clubs thrust worms into journalists' gaping beaks this afternoon
The views in this story are those of the author and not necessarily those of the clubs or the AFL.
