IF the events of last weekend proved one thing to AFL headquarters ... THEN. Picture: AFL Digital

IT'S BACK ... Damian Barrett's Sliding Doors has returned for 2022 and no one and NO CLUB is safe.

So put your seatbelt on and enjoy the ride as Damo takes off the gloves and takes aim at your team.

So what is he saying about your club? What's he saying about the AFL? You can't say that, Damo, can you?

>> CLICK HERE TO READ MORE BARRETT  

Check it out below, and don't forget to catch the latest episode of AFL Daily while you're here.

IF ...

Matty Nicks' memory is sound ...

THEN ...

he'll recall, unfortunately, that Crows football director and media commentator Mark Ricciuto was making similar negative noises about Brenton Sanderson's coaching in 2014. This club's many recent failings can’t all be tied to the coaches. Ricciuto has been in his club role since 2014.

IF ..

Lachie Neale won a Brownlow two seasons ago ...

THEN ...

it is a scary proposition for opponents that Lions insiders believe his preparation and determination in 2022 is off the charts in comparison. Adding goalkicking to his skill-set, too.

00:46

IF ...

you've heard that metal-on-glass twisting sound this week ...

THEN ...

yep, it was what you thought it was. Blues supporters taking the premiership hopes lid off.

IF ...

Brayden Maynard at some stage of his two-week absence through suspension wondered if there had been a relaxation on the actual premise on protection of the head (hello Willie Rioli) ...

THEN ...

he would have been more than entitled to do so.

00:51

IF ...

Zach Merrett was already an enforced omission with serious injury ...

THEN ...

Dev Smith's omission for form reasons is a massive statement from Truck Rutten. Not mucking around anymore. Francis axed too.

IF ...

the last time Jaymie Graham acted as a stand-in senior AFL coach his team went on to win that year's flag (Eagles, 2018)  ...

THEN ...

the Dockers will be reading positivity into this week's tea leaves. Out Longmuir (COVID contact), in Graham for Sunday's game against the crosstown rival.

IF ...

there is one thing Joel Selwood has never sought in football ...

THEN ...

it is personal acclaim over team. But on the weekend on which he becomes the game's leader for matches as captain (227), it is also worth reminding people he is the seventh-highest poller of Brownlow votes (and came second in 2013 with 27 votes), is a six-time All-Australian (and three-time captain), a three-time best and fairest winner. A guaranteed Hall of Famer since way before the halfway point of his career.

IF ...

the season-opening win was good against West Coast and the round two loss to Melbourne more than OK ...

THEN ...

the Suns get to round three with the perfect opportunity to prove to themselves as much as the footy world that they are genuinely improving. Must beat the troubled Giants.

IF ...

Phil Davis is not seen for half a season after ripping his hamstring last weekend ...

THEN ...

that's very unfortunate for a guy who has crucially shaped the course of the Giants' 11 seasons in the AFL.

00:54

IF ...

Will Day was merely placed among the possible inclusions on Thursday night for Sunday's massive match against the Blues ...

THEN ...

I really hope he makes the final cut. Something very special about this 20-year-old.

IF ...

as expected the Dees defeat Essendon at the MCG under Friday night lights ...

THEN ...

that will be 10 wins from 10 matches (rounds 20-23, QF, PF, GF in 2021, rounds 1-3 in 2022) for Jake Bowey. In the 66 matches across the 2012, 2013 and 2014 seasons, the Dees won 10 matches. Extraordinary times.

IF ...

Jaidyn Stephenson hasn't already had enough wake-up calls in a short and initially brilliant AFL career ...

THEN ...

he won't be afforded the luxury of many more. Back in the team after being axed for round two. Must show some desperation from here. And urgency.

IF ...

there's no cause for panic just yet ...

THEN ...

there will be if there's a loss in Friday night's Showdown. And not mild panic. Major panic.

IF ...

the ins are Grimes, Riewoldt and Maurice Rioli ...

THEN ...

that's a trio of famous Tigers names. Got their mojo back last week against GWS, the Tigers, and still backing them in 2022 to be back where they're most comfortable – at the pointy end of the ladder.

IF ...

Paddy Ryder is back and fit ...

THEN ...

this team is always a chance. No player in the comp is more important to his team, even at 34 years of age.

IF ...

the lopsided free kick count wasn't the reason the Swans lost to the Dogs on Thursday ...

THEN ...

it certainly didn't help. And John Longmire rarely gets through even one day without recalling, in his eyes, the highly questionable officiating in the 2016 Grand Final against the same team.

09:50

IF ...

each of the 53 matches dating back to 1995 between the Dockers and Eagles have been referred to as a Western Derby ...

THEN ...

given the COVID-addled, banged-up nature of both teams, with the Freo coach the latest to be sidelined, match No.54, on Sunday evening, has a change of title: Demolition Derby.

IF ...

Bont has played many better games than Thursday night against the Swans ...

THEN ...

this one will still rank very highly in his extraordinary catalogue. Has been banged up since damaging an ankle in the season-opener, copped a very heavy hit to the shoulder against Sydney, and yet still had the power of mind to execute a massive spoil in the final quarter and also gut-run to the right spot and kick the match-sealing goal in the final seconds.

00:00

AND THIS ONE'S FOR THE AFL

IF ...

the events of last weekend proved one thing to the game's headquarters ...

THEN ...

it was that the big forwards have always been the true rock stars, and that every possible measure – through rule changes - must be made to ensure that the rock stars are actually allowed to rock. There's zero fan appeal on having 24 players inside the one 50m zone, and the other 12 just outside of it.