1. No man is an island
286 games, 14 years, an integral part of the club; a Fremantle legend. We speak of course of the bloke at Subi who rings a bell each time Peter Bell gets the ball.
Harrowing times surely lie ahead for the bloke, after Bell announced his retirement yesterday, effective immediately.
Where to from here, he must be wondering this morning, as he tucks into his potaroo and banana loaf, or whatever it is they substitute for good old-fashioned Weetbix in the west.
Does the bell go into mothballs, to be carefully stored in the event of Freo snaffling a future recruit named Bell, or perhaps one named Peel? Should he keep the bell but remove the clapper, and continue to ring it each game in forlorn and silent tribute?
If Bell's sudden, apparently selfless retirement has taught us anything, it has taught us that footy players do not exist in isolation, and that the retirement of one diminishes a club and the sport as a whole.
What are we saying here? Just this: send not to ask for whom the bell tolls, bloke at Subi who rings a bell each time Peter Bell gets the ball. It tolls for thee.
2. All aboard
YOU WAIT all season for a big-name retirement, stamping your feet and blowing into your hands, and then two come at once, papping their horns and waiting politely while you gather your shopping and search your pockets for change. Hang on, that might be buses. Whichever it is, Michael Braun retired yesterday, reducing the number of former Echuca United players in the league by one.
Braun is just 30, but in his 12 seasons with West Coast has undergone a staggering 14 operations, presumably leaving only bits of the original Braun intact, and the rest a sort of bionic exoskeleton, capable of leaping across buildings in a single bound and perhaps even prising visible emotion from coach John Worsfold.
Worsfold suggested Braun will add to his 222 games against Richmond on Sunday, ahead of a farewell game later in the season. There'll be reaction from the club today.
3. Welcome to dumpsville
MELBOURNE footballer Aaron Davey is also Heartbeat host Aaron Davey, which leaves us in a bit of a pickle.
Davey, 25, was disciplined by the club yesterday, after he travelled to Darwin for a funeral before round 14 and admitted on his return to grieving a little too exuberantly. The Demons have banished him to the VFL, citing unprofessional preparation for the match against the Lions in which Davey still managed 14 touches and seven tackles.
Regardless of Davey's performance at the MCG, or on set, we suppose it's the principle of the thing that is important. And so we'll follow the only course of action available and recommend to the leadership group in the office that Heartbeat spend a week with the rapscallions over on vfl.com.au.
It's all about setting an example for impressionable young videos, like Stats City and the Aurion V6 AFL Dream Team Show.
4. Welcome to dumpsville II
YOU WAIT all season for a player to be suspended by his club, and then, while you're stamping your feet, two shiny red double-deckers … sorry, have we done that one already?
In all the kerfuffle over retirements and afl.com.au video segments, you might not have noticed that reclusive Swans full-forward Barry Hall was in the news a bit yesterday.
Hall, who copped a seven-match ban earlier in the season for striking Brent Staker, was dumped indefinitely by the club after being suspended for a match for taking a swing at Collingwood's Shane Wakelin on Saturday night.
Curiously, Hall revealed this morning that although he had anticipated being sacked by the club, offered as trade bait, and a hundred other scenarios, he hadn't actually expected to be dropped pending psychological approval.
Obviously, this raises the question of what other unlikely outcomes Hall had anticipated. Answers on the back of a postcard, please.
WHAT'S COMING UP
What to look out for on afl.com.au this Tuesday
NAB AFL Rising Star
Intrepid reporter Jennifer Witham tracks this week's young 'un to his remote mountain hideaway and then asks him whether he's pleased to have been nominated. Also, there'll be video.
Club news
Like squirrels after winter, clubs are emerging blinking from their burrows after the split round. No less than seven Melbourne-based clubs front the press today, led by Hawthorn, Collingwood, North and Richmond. Will St Kilda coach Ross Lyon see his shadow? Find out around noon.
The best of the west
Reaction from the Fremantle and Eagles camps after yesterday's batch of retirements.
The views in this story are those of the author and not necessarily those of the clubs or the AFL.
