Once you’ve played Dream Team for a while, it becomes hard to distinguish between good players and bad players; between great games and average games; between admirable pieces of play and selfish opportunism.
In the old days, a quick handball off to a teammate was undisputedly a good thing. It was the right thing to do – it was the team thing to do – and if it resulted in a goal, then all the better. But no one’s applauding handballers now!
Why handball when you can kick? Why pass when you can run? Why not spin around, dodge, slip a tackle, baulk, and then toss it onto your non-preferred and have a stab at it yourself? After all, it’s nine points we’re talking about here, and as Gordon Gekko once said – in this game, greed is good.
Good players, bad players
The obsession with stats over good football can lead to confusion about who is doing well. Average or inexperienced players can seem like champions, while champions can be considered chumps.
Take Simon Prestigiacomo, for example. In Dream Team terms, Presti is the ultimate joke – a gag, a punchline, a player you pick for a laugh. Selecting Presti in your side is like stapling a note to your forehead that says “I’m at new at this game - SMASH ME!”
He costs $144,000, averages a paltry 31, and in a career spanning 14 years and 209 games, has never broken 70! Presti’s highest score was achieved way back in round eight, 1999, when he went absolutely nuts and racked up 67 against Freo. They still talk about that day, the Prestigiacomos.
The thing is, as a footballer Presti is actually great. He’s a wonderful defender, an integral part of Collingwood’s defence and if you follow the team as I do, you never want the guy to miss!
The truth is out there
While Dream Team scores can understate a player’s performance, they can overestimate it as well. Coaches who rely too much on raw stats can get a rude shock when a player they thought was tearing it up suddenly departs from the side: “What do you mean they dropped Jaxson Barham? The guy’s a football magnet and scored 122 on debut!”
Never mind that Jaxson turned the ball over. Never mind that he had more chance of hitting an ice cream truck on Punt Road than he did of hitting a teammate on the chest. Jaxson was what every Dream Teamer fantasises about – an $86,600 rookie who, for one glorious week, had a higher average than Gary Ablett.
Double prizes
Although Dream Team scores sometimes fail to capture a player’s true performance, they’re often spot on – and there’s nothing more satisfying than watching a brilliant player rack up a brilliant score.
Anyone who watched Jimmy Bartel last week against the Saints knows what I’m talking about. In the strange parlance of football commentators, he was “an ornament to the game” and captained the Mayors magnificently.
This week’s question
This week, I want you to answer the question “What’s the strangest place or occasion you’ve found yourself thinking about Dream Team...” and send it in to dreamteam@afl.com.au, making sure to put ‘Hindy’ in the subject line. I’ll run the best answers in next week’s column.
Thanks to all those people who answered last week’s question “I knew I had the Medusa touch when..?”
Shayne Flanagan believes he broke Ben Reid’s foot
Adam Smith dislocated Brent Harvey’s elbow
And Daniel Fargher killed Hodge, then Waite, then Thornton in an impressive triple play.
Cheers,
Hindy
CEO and coach of the Hindsight Mayors
The views in this article are those of the author and not necessarily those of the clubs or the AFL.
