WITH the 2022 Toyota AFL Premiership season racing to its conclusion, Damian Barrett's Sliding Doors is really starting to crank up.
So put your seatbelt on and enjoy the ride as Damo takes off the gloves and takes aim at your team.
So what is he saying about your club? What's he saying about the AFL? You can't say that, Damo, can you? Check it out below.
>> CLICK HERE TO READ MORE BARRETT
IF ...
Darcy Fogarty has now settled into a very nice form groove ...
THEN ...
hopefully Riley Thilthorpe can too. Recalled for round 22. A key facet of the Crows' future.
IF ..
you're coming up against a team which includes Max King in a Friday night lights game which will determine finals double chance prospects ...
THEN ...
losing Marcus Adams to concussion far from ideal.
IF ...
the Blues lucked out with the seriously flawed AFL judicial system (see below) and Patrick Cripps has been freed to play ...
THEN ...
let's now see what that actually means on the field. Time to arrest an alarming form slump, and show some ticker, after a very ordinary 10-match streak which staggeringly threatens to see this club miss finals after an 8-2 start.
IF ...
one thing has become clear in this most extraordinary of seasons compiled by Collingwood ...
THEN ...
it is that winning margins simply don’t matter to this team. Eleven wins in a row, 10 victories in 2022 have been by less than two goals. In the past five games, average winning margin has been 5.8 points. Contrast that with Sunday’s opponent, Sydney – average margin for it in the same time has been 42.8. I keep saying it so one day I will be right. The streak will end this week.
IF ...
there has been a lot of noise about Dyson Heppell's future ...
THEN ...
I still can't see him leaving the Bombers. Suns obviously very keen. But he's always said no in the past when rivals come knocking.
IF ...
the Dockers have bigger destinations on their 2022 road trip ...
THEN ...
the Eagles in a Perth derby in round 22 is still a massive roadstop on that journey. Refill the tank. Quick coffee stop. Hamburger to go. Full speed to next destination – the Giants in Canberra.
IF ...
Paddy Dangerfield was a car ...
THEN ...
he'd be an American Muscle beast, circa the Classic era, 1968. Camaro, Mustang. Take your pick. Still looks a million bucks, still got the full V8 grunt, still got the wow factor, can go all day once he's going. But also got the worry - will he actually start in winter?
IF ...
some will be satisfied with how 2022 has unfolded ...
THEN ...
not me. Had a genuine chance to make a finals run, but disappeared very quickly. Yes, injuries have been at play, but that isn’t a problem exclusive to the Suns.
IF ...
the Giants-Bulldogs had emerged in recent years as one of the major AFL rivalries ...
THEN ...
the main reason for that status was Toby Greene. Unfortunately out of Saturday's match with a thumb injury.
IF ...
the Hawks have hit a very nice patch of form with four wins from the past five matches ...
THEN ...
let's not get too carried away. Three of those four have been against teams last, second last and fourth last on the ladder.
IF ...
a lot of things about the Demons in 2022 haven’t made sense to me, including teammates punching on, the former president publicly not seeing eye to eye with the current president, and the regular airing of behavioural issues of the coach ...
THEN ...
the latest head scratcher is the pursuit of Brodie Grundy. Surely finding a key forward would be more pressing.
IF ...
you're axing Jason Horne-Francis for a round 22 match in what would have been his first game in front of SA family and friends, and when you had previously had reason to do so for a number of reasons, both behavioural and form, but soft-optioned it ...
THEN ...
don't be surprised if he does officially seek a transfer at the end of the year. Staggering management of the No.1 national draft pick.
IF ...
Kochie on Thursday night publicly confirmed Kenny, as contracted, would be coach in 2023 ...
THEN ...
I wonder even more than I did at the time why he felt the need during the week to publicly question Kenny and those around him. Maybe it's not just Kenny who has been there too long.
IF ...
the stats attached to Tom Lynch’s form are impressive enough (47 goals from 16 matches, and only Coleman Medal-leading Curnow has a better average) ...
THEN ...
his real impact in the Tigers' most unlikely of flag campaigns is not measurable by stats. Presence. He’s had a lot of it in a fine career for two clubs, but he’s never had more than in the past two matches (Port Adelaide and Brisbane).
IF ...
I vigorously questioned it at the time and was aggressively shot down ...
THEN ...
surely St Kilda now concedes the massively expensive Dan Hannebery project just didn't work. Will always be regarded as a Sydney Swans great. But 17 matches in four seasons as a Saint on massive money hasn't been great return. And why use the word "managed" to leave him out of this most crucial of 2022 matches, a Friday night lights game against Brisbane?
IF ...
some memories unfortunately fade ...
THEN ...
hopefully all the ones containing Josh Kennedy remain vivid. The South Melbourne/Sydney Swans icon announced his retirement this week. For six straight seasons, 2012-17, was among the game’s absolute best midfielders. Three B&Fs, three All-Australian jackets, two fourth places in a Brownlow, and on five occasions among the top 15 in a Brownlow.
IF ...
the outcome of a Perth derby, like the Adelaide Showdown, has traditionally never been a match never determined in advance by ladder position ...
THEN ...
unfortunately this one on Saturday night actually is. Eagles are no chance.
IF ...
there is now a tendency of clubs to use the word "managed" to explain a player's omission ...
THEN ...
I don't understand it. He's either axed or injured. It's OK to call it. It's been happening at team selection for 100-plus years. Josh Bruce "managed" out of Saturday's game against GWS.
AND THIS ONE'S FOR THE AFL
IF ...
you're familiar with my views on the AFL judiciary system ...
THEN ...
you'll know I have loooong viewed it as a complete joke. Loooong before the Patty Cripps outcome. One official "independent" AFL body, the Match Review Office, makes a ruling. Another official "independent" AFL body, the AFL Tribunal, makes another ruling. But wait for it - then yet another "independent" AFL body, the AFL Appeals Tribunal, gets to makes yet another ruling. It's 2022. Surely we are better than this. Yet again, because of the heavy allowance of lawyers into the system, the game's controlling body is constantly issuing ridiculously mixed messages.
