Or to put it another way…………
ADMIRAL ANDY DISCOVERS ‘THE SECRET’!
You’ve gotta laugh don’t you?
No, not at yet another chapter in the crazy footballing life of Matthew Richardson – as constantly amusing as that is you’re on the wrong website for that.
No, not at Jason Akermanis’ strange compulsion in using hair dye to make his head look like a Collingwood jumper.
And definitely no, not whether the use of free range eggs makes the Whitnall feud more tasteful.
What I’m torkin about is the whole salary crap/interstate club dominance/ favouritism thingy that, as the rest of football world begins to wake up to it, is fast becoming flavour of the month.
Now let’s be honest folks, this hasn’t snuck up on us like Richard Wilkins with a microphone on the Red Carpet! Back when television football commentary used to be good – you remember, when Eddie used to get bagged for ‘barracking for’ the Pies as opposed to the current batch of talking heads who ‘barrack AGAINST’ the Pies, ( a BIG hello to you Messrs Lynch, Dunstall, Walls, Quartermain, Lane, Voss, et al. You know things are really crook when the ONLY Collingwood ‘man’ on telly is Ricky Oleranshaw!!) – the Woods fought a somewhat bitter campaign to have the obscene salary cap advantages Brisbane and Sydney had evened out. Of course, back then the Pies were lambasted for being sooks despite the fact that they DIDN’T WANT TO PENALISE THE BRIANS OR SWANS – they just wanted the salary caps to be EVEN. I’ll say it again – EVEN!!!!!!
Now my understanding of ‘even’ means no advantage to Collingwood and no advantage to Brisbane. I would have thought that wasn’t too hard to understand, it’s not like it was macro-economics or Kerri-Anne Kennely’s longevity on television we’re torkin’ here! It should never have been that baffling. All of which makes this weekend’s ranting and raving from the north highly amusing.
If you enjoy a good wine with your meal grab something to eat now.
Lions CEO Michael Bowers explains how the Magpies recruited Blake Caracella when the Brians reduced salary cap allowance forced him out of the club (which could also be described as poor list management).
"Collingwood had a policy, go after the big names," Bower said.
"Voss was a hair's breath from being taken, they went massively for Brown."
Hmmmmmmmmm. Now Voss and Brown never went anywhere and, correct me if I’m wrong Mr. Bowers but didn’t Brisbane, with a bigger salary cap allowance, pinch Cara from the Bombers premiership side? And wasn’t Cara integral to the Brians own premierships?
Not to be outdone Leigh Matthews who, it appears has his own one whinge per week allowance, chimed in with this pearl:
"Sydney have got even more concessions than Brisbane used to and if they had beaten Collingwood in their premiership and not West Coast, there would have been a campaign to end it,"
Errrrrrrrr Leigh, according to official research the cost of living in Brisbane is not only less than that of Sydney but it is also FREAKIN’ LESS than that of Melbourne. Please don’t confuse a Cost Of Living allowance with an AFL endorsed slush fund designed to stop Brisbane players leaving the club. Crikey, you’d think three flags this decade might make them stay.
All of which makes those zany social engineers at the AFL’s ‘stunning’ revelation this week that Victorian footy is crook and some sort of ‘investigation’ begin to find out why quite comical.
"I think we wanted to believe that it is a cycle, but history is now starting to go against that belief," Mr Demetriou said. "We are pretty sure that it is more than cyclical."
Fair Dinkum!?
You just have to shake your head.
Collingwood were banging on about this FIVE BLOODY YEARS AGO!!!!Victorian football isn’t crook – it’s competing with a massive handicap. Remove the handicap and it will even itself up.
The ox may be slow and pretty ordinary as a commentator but the earth is becoming increasingly impatient!
Thankfully next week I’ll explain how to fix it.
Please note: the views expressed in the above article are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of the Collingwood Football Club or employees of the club. The Collingwood Football Club would like to acknowledge the tireless work of its supporters who contribute to collingwoodfc.com.au.
