If

we'd called for it for at least eight weeks ...

 then ... we're happy right now. Scotty Thompson is back. Will be a great help for the struggling Sloane.

If

you've only got 24 games behind you and you're coming up against Tom Mr Reliable Lonergan, in game 200 ...

 then ... we'd normally say, without conviction, "good luck". But Hipwood doesn't need it. He's a star already.



If

you're going to pick Harry McKay in a squad of 25 on Thursday night ...

 then ... it means nothing if you don't include him in the final 22 on Friday night. Come on. Give him a go!

If

in February last year you've dared tell the world you broke a finger playing Frisbee with your dog and by July this year you've been elevated to a four-man leadership group ...

 then ... we love your work even more, Jeremy Howe. One of the handful of players our eyes are automatically drawn to every time the ball is kicked his way.



If

the CEO wants to tweet some harsh thoughts ...

 then ... he's entitled to. He was right, too. No need to be sorry.

If you're a regular reader ... then ... you know our appreciation of Michael Walters. Back to outright No.1 on our favourites list after the courage to bounce back last week with a competition season-best individual performance, after the last-second disaster of the week prior.



If you go all the way back to 2006 and recall the story about the young player who lost a kidney and so much blood that he nearly died ... then ... fast forward to 2017 where that guy is now 33 and about to play game 200 … truly incredible feat, Tom Lonergan.

If you're Rodney Eade and your job is on the line and you've lost Gaz and Pearce with hamstrings ... then ... you're shaking your head pretty hard.

If someone's overdue for a big game ... then ... it's Rory Lobb. We're backing him in.



If the Hawks jumped in a time machine and transported back to last October's trade period ... then ... they're not committing all sorts of money and draft picks, as well as subsequent degrees of embarrassment, for O'Meara and Vickery.



If

you package up the past nine weeks, where six matches were won, two were lost narrowly and one very badly ...

 then ... the doom of the most recent week of those nine doesn't make sense. We're still buying this team on the immediate futures market. And Hogan back is massive, even if takes him a month to find form.

If you haven't won a wooden spoon since 1972, when you won three in five years ... then ... you probably want to beat Freo at Etihad on Sunday.

If

for the past two seasons we've dubbed another mob as 'flat-trackers' ...

 then ... if this team this season continues its woeful record against top-eight sides, then it will take over that title. Oh, look who it's playing this week!



If the Tigers maintain their form of the first 15 weeks ... then ... win 10 of 2017 is guaranteed.

If

you want to designate one match as season defining ...

 then ... for this club it's this one against the Tiges.

If everyone else seems to be handing out 'coach of the year' awards long before they need to ... then ... we may as well join in, too. Our man, after 14 matches, is Longmire. At 0-6 it would've been sooooo easy, like so many before him, to roll over and work toward a great draft pick. Instead, he was still obsessed with another flag THIS year.



If

in late May - after he had dropped to the ground like he was shot - you go public that Josh Kennedy will be right to go in three weeks, and it's now six weeks later and he's still sidelined ...

 then ... we wonder why we believed you in the first place. Mind you, you're certainly not alone at club level in being economical with the truth.



If Thompson coming back for the Crows is good for Sloane ... then ... so too is Libba for JJ. Big game tonight for so many players. JJ goes into it under most pressure.


And by popular request ...

If

you're waiting for a local league tribunal to sit before presenting a public position ...

 then

... we say now what we said Monday night: we don't get it. But you did get there in the end.

Follow Damian Barrett on Twitter: @barrettdamian