A REALITY check this time last year, and the process of mending relationships has spurred Brisbane's Jade Ellenger to a career best season.

Following the AFL Grand Final in 2023, Ellenger and teammate Poppy Boltz opted to stay in Melbourne after their round five win over Hawthorn, and in the process broke club rules.

Although not going into specifics, coach Craig Starcevich said at the time the pair suffered from a lack of sleep and did "not meet our professional standards as a group", labelling the incident a "wake-up call" for his players.

The pair were omitted from the senior side the following week as punishment, instead forced to play in a scrimmage with other non-selected players.

"It was such a shit time, I'll be honest with you," Ellenger told AFL.com.au.

"It was sad to hurt so many people because they were so disappointed, but it made us realise that holy shit, we have such a big impact on this group, especially me being there for so long.

"The disappointment that was felt throughout the group, I was like 'Okay, yeah, my position is very valued in this team'. They were so upset that I would put that in jeopardy, so that made me realise that this is a lot more serious."

Upon returning to the side in round seven, Ellenger featured in every game over Brisbane's run toward the flag, and ultimately became a two-time premiership player by season's end.

Mending relationships was key to her return to the team, and regaining trust of her teammates and, specifically, Starcevich.

"I actually spoke with Bree Brock (Brisbane head of women's football) first because it's like, the mum and dad situation. I needed to go and talk to mum first," Ellenger said.

She was planning on making the two-hour drive to Starcevich's house north of Brisbane for a conversation to clear the air, but first wanted to check with Brock that it was a good idea.

"I was like, 'This is what I want to do, do you think this would be a dumb idea? Would it be received well?' and she was like 'You sure you want to do that? That would be incredible, but you don't need to drive two hours today'."

But for Ellenger's peace of mind, it was necessary. So, she made the drive up the coast.

"We sat at the surf club talking for probably three, four hours. We have a great relationship, he's almost part of my family, we've been around each other for so long and spend pretty much every day together. We do have a lot of honest conversations," Ellenger said.

That conversation laid the foundation for the player – and person – she is today. Openness, honesty, respectful and, above all, a greater understanding of her role within the bigger Brisbane Lions picture.

"I'm more confident and comfortable with my spot in the team," Ellenger said.

"There's always going to be that little chip on the shoulder of (having) a point to prove. They could have not given us a contract extension in the off season because we did make a big mistake, but they showed that they believe in me. They were like 'No, we know you made a mistake, you're not going to do it again'.

"It's kind of like repaying them in a sense."

Repaying them has come by way of a closer adherence to off field expectations, as well as some impressive form on field.

Against West Coast in week four Ellenger had a career-best game, recording 18 disposals – all kicks – as well as a game-high 675 metres gained, and kicked two goals.

The performance came at the end of Brisbane's mid-week footy period, in which it played three games over a 10-day stretch.

"It was definitely tough, and we probably didn't realise how exhausted we were until it was finished. We were riding the adrenaline wave whist we were playing, but the second we finished that West Coast game, I think all I've done is sleep," Ellenger said.

"I love watching a game of footy every single night, like that is brilliant, but from a player welfare perspective, not as brilliant."

All of this has come amidst a busy schedule for the 24-year-old, who is currently in the throes of her final semester of a Master of Nursing and managing a long-distance relationship.

"I've had one of the most chaotic pre-seasons, personally," Ellenger admitted.

"I've been doing full time study, full time placement, and I haven't missed a training session. The start of this year I was away for three months doing a rural placement out in St George which was awesome. That was my mental break away from footy, and then once I was back, I was so ready to just hit the ground running."

The mental refresh worked, as she has played every game of the season to date, averaging a personal best 15.8 disposals and 5.2 intercepts, with a move to half back suiting her aggressive running style of play.

All of that has also come with frequent trips to Sydney to visit her partner, Sydney co-captain Chloe Molloy.

This weekend her allegiance to the Lions in the AFL will come at odds to her relationship, as their respective men's sides will meet in Saturday's Grand Final.

"I'm jealous that she gets to go," Ellenger laughed.

"That's probably the only rivalry I've got at the moment, but obviously I have full faith that our boys are going to get up, and she has full faith that her boys are going to get up.

"It's incredible to think that both our clubs are in a Grand Final, we were literally talking about it yesterday, what are the odds of that?"

Despite last year's indiscretion, the Lions have been supportive of Ellenger, giving her the time and space needed to travel to and from Sydney on a regular basis.

"If it was any longer than a one-hour flight it would be so much harder, but we're very, very lucky that for some of the long weekends that we've had, we can just quickly nip down for the weekend," Ellenger said.

"It's definitely not easy, but it's worth it."

Since Molloy was struck down with an ACL injury three weeks ago, Ellenger has been working hard to balance her support of her partner, with everything else going on in her life, and that's only been made possible thanks to the backing of the Lions.

"They've just been so understanding with what's happened and how hard it would be on her to, one; be away from family, and then two; be away from a partner as well," Ellenger said.

"Craig's been great, he's been really accommodating for me to come and see her whenever I can. I'm actually sitting in Sydney Airport right now."

This AFL Grand Final weekend the Lions' AFLW program will be staying home, preparing to face arch-rival Adelaide on Sunday at Brighton Homes Arena.

It is a game Ellenger is always excited for, not just because it is a chance for the Lions to show exactly what they're made of, but because of the type of game Brisbane v Adelaide clashes inevitably are.

"It is a rivalry, absolutely, but it's not like a feisty one as if we hate each other. We all know we're going to have a good game against them, we just both go one-on-one, we don't try and just stop the other team from scoring," Ellenger explained.

"I just love when teams are like 'We will just back our structure, and you'll back yours', that's exactly what happens with Adelaide."